How to Stop Functional Programming
8 hours ago
- #coding standards
- #functional programming
- #workplace satire
- A coworker complains about not understanding your functional programming code, leading to a manager's decision to ban functional programming.
- You attempt to comply by modifying a pure function (`userCoworkers`) to include side-effects (logging, mutable state) while still maintaining purity.
- The manager's vague rule ('no functional programming') creates confusion—how many side-effects are needed to qualify as non-functional?
- A product manager requests a change (displaying coworker count instead of a list), forcing you to perform impure operations (e.g., summing numbers).
- The satirical tone highlights the absurdity of banning paradigms without clear guidelines, leaving developers struggling to adhere to arbitrary rules.