communication

Bilingual

Don't be a meat proxy
2 months ago
- Don't just relay AI-generated responses verbatim; it doesn't add value.
- Reading AI output requires extra effort due to verbosity, plausible nonsense, and jargon.
- Instead, read, understand, validate, and then rewrite the response in your own words.
- In code reviews, using AI to generate code without understanding reduces the human to a 'meat proxy'.
Saying the quiet part out loud
2 months ago
- The phrase 'saying the quiet part out loud' means explicitly stating the reasons behind team practices, even when they seem obvious.
- This habit prevents the false assumption that colleagues already know or agree with the rationale, clarifying expectations.
- Stating beliefs publicly invites disagreement and debate, allowing team members to challenge assumptions or seek alignment.
- It requires confidence but fosters an open, trusting environment and a culture of honest feedback.
- The author observed this practice in admired colleagues and is adopting it themselves.
- A commenter described a manager who facilitated team working agreements by asking about past inhibitors and enhancers, then updating them annually.
Corona und dein Onkel - Bert Hubert's writings
2 months ago
- Focus on the undecided majority, not the hardcore conspiracy theorists, as they are resistant to facts and evidence.
- Use strategies like staying on topic, demanding credible sources, and avoiding endless debates over rumors to maintain control of the conversation.
- Provide reliable information and answer questions patiently, using techniques like the 'sandwich of truth' to reduce defensiveness and build trust.
Passive Voice Considered Harmful
2 months ago
- Passive voice omits critical information like who performs an action, creating ambiguity.
- Active voice follows 'actor → verb → object' structure, which is clearer and easier to parse.
- Converting passive sentences to active voice often reveals gaps in thinking or design.
- Passive voice can be useful to avoid assigning blame in problem discussions.
- It can communicate mistakes tactfully without sounding accusatory.
- It can omit irrelevant details that don't contribute to the core narrative.
- Recognizing passive voice involves spotting a form of 'to be' plus a past participle.
Underused Techniques for Effective Emails
2 months ago
- Effective emails are clear, relevant, efficient, and succinct.
- Deliver the most important information first using bottom-line, up front (BLUF) or inverted pyramid style.
- Use the Markdown Here browser extension to format emails with Markdown.
- Write complete replies to minimize email thread length instead of quick replies.
- Split threads and curate recipients when scope changes, updating subject line and recipients.
- Create structure with headings and paragraph breaks for long emails.
Talking to Technical People - Bert Hubert's writings
2 months ago
- People often communicate indirectly at work, using hints and polite language to avoid conflict, but technical people may not pick up on these cues.
- Technical experts prefer to be told the desired outcome, constraints, timeline, and motivation, not the exact method of execution.
- Indirect communication (hints, stories) risks misunderstanding because technical people are trained to focus on explicit facts, not read between the lines.
- To effectively communicate with technical people, be explicit about what you need and why, while leaving room for them to decide how to achieve it.
On Linus Torvalds, technical & corporate communications - Bert Hubert's writings
2 months ago
- Linus Torvalds' communication style degraded from robust to hurtful, but he is now seeking help.
- Three communication styles are contrasted: aggressive honesty, corporate HR-compliant verbosity, and concise engineer-style directness.
- The engineer-style response is recommended as it is direct yet respectful, avoiding both insults and bureaucratic padding.
- Supporters of Linus' old style mistakenly conflate swearing with honesty, fearing that avoiding insults leads to corporate drivel.
- It is possible to communicate concisely without insulting, and engineering organizations should strive for this.
how to communicate with intent
2 months ago
- Adapt your message to your audience, explaining concepts at their level of understanding and focusing on concrete impacts.
- Consider your purpose before communicating—whether to inform, persuade, or practice—and tailor your approach accordingly.
- Avoid arguing with people who are unwilling to be convinced; focus on productive discussions.
- Be a good conversational partner by asking probing questions and sharing conversational effort.
- Recognize that infodumping can be awkward or overwhelming; match the level of detail to the listener's interest and knowledge.
- During apologies, avoid infodumping; apologize directly and briefly, if needed, provide limited context without expecting forgiveness.
- Understand that even well-intentioned infodumps cannot prevent all miscommunication; say what you mean and address issues as they arise.
- Communicate with legibility and intent: say what you mean, and if you have nothing to say, stay silent.
Why Am I Doing the Thinking for You?
2 months ago
- Asking 'What do you think?' without sharing your own opinion outsources your thinking work to others, creating extra cognitive load.
- This behavior often stems from not reading/understanding the document or from fear of committing to a position.
- A better approach is to state a clear recommendation with reasoning, consider alternatives, and set a deadline for feedback.
- This transforms 'help me think' into 'check my thinking,' respecting others' time and accelerating decision-making.
- Even when unsure, share a tentative position with context to reduce ambiguity and move things forward.
Preparing for a Tech Talk, Part 2: What, Why, and How — overreacted
2 months ago
- The author shares a personal framework for preparing tech talks centered on three elements: What (core idea), Why (emotional motivation), and How (delivery method).
- The 'What' is a concise, single-sentence idea (under 12 words) that serves as the intellectual backbone of the talk, ensuring all content supports it.
- The 'Why' is the emotional core, drawing from Inception to emphasize positive emotion over reason, making the audience care about the idea.
- The 'How' refers to the delivery technique (e.g., live demos) and will be explored in later posts, but early clarity on What and Why prevents later issues.
Saying the obvious thing
2 months ago
- Stating the obvious is useful because much of our knowledge is subconscious, and articulating it can clarify our own thoughts.
- Reading obvious truths that are rarely discussed can provide catharsis and validation, especially for junior engineers noticing unspoken workplace realities.
- Stating the obvious is difficult because it requires dropping layers of interpretation to see what's actually there, similar to drawing what you see.
- Articulating obvious truths is valuable in technical blogging, design documents, and literature, as it aligns understanding and captures essential human experiences.
- Don't avoid writing down obvious ideas; they can recede from consciousness quickly, and they help newcomers feel less isolated.
- Stating the obvious provides a foundation for exploring nuanced, non-obvious implications that would be inaccessible without first stating the obvious.
The AI Boom Made Average People More Interesting
2 months ago
- The author is now reliably getting replies from people like state representatives, VPs, authors, and journalists, after years of low success rates.
- The success rate of starting conversations has increased from an anecdotal 2% to a level where replies are almost expected.
- The author attributes this change to the rarity of genuine human communication as more people rely on AI for their voice and writing.
- Being unmistakably human has become a competitive advantage in an age of synthetic communication.
Banter
2 months ago
- Banter involves calling someone out for a transgression in a way that makes it clear the loss is small and they are still accepted in the group.
- It helps cap potential social anxiety by acknowledging flaws openly with humor, preventing unspoken tensions and defusing social land mines.
- If a person feels insecure in the group, banter can backfire, leading to a spiral where they react defensively, showing it's unsafe to joke with them.
- Friendships that survive conflicts or banter often feel more secure than those based solely on 'Good Vibes Only,' as they build trust through resilience.
- Banter expresses acceptance of flaws and foibles, signaling that minor point losses don't matter, fostering safety compared to silence or harsh criticism.
Most arguments are about ego, not ideas
3 months ago
- The author, a software engineer, stopped arguing because winning arguments often led to personal alienation rather than persuasion.
- Correctness is not always beneficial; it creates a dynamic of right versus wrong, producing a loser and damaging relationships.
- Arguments are often ego-driven rather than about ideas, making rational debate futile and turning disagreements into personal fights.
- Humans are primarily emotional beings who rationalize feelings, not logical creatures, so logical arguments are often ineffective.
- Correcting others rarely helps; people learn from consequences, not advice, and unsolicited correction is usually perceived as criticism.
- Help should only be offered when explicitly requested, as it creates an opening for advice to be received without ego barriers.
- Instead of arguing, profit from differences by building on unique perspectives, treating disagreement as an opportunity or competitive edge.
- The only person one can change is oneself; focusing on self-improvement shifts one's experience of the world and brings peace.
- Self-improvement comes from seeking feedback and listening humbly, as ego prevents learning and growth.
How to ask for help from people who don't know you
3 months ago
- Asking for help is a skill, not an innate attribute; the key principle is to put yourself in the other person's mind.
- To make someone want to help, demonstrate you are worth helping by showing proof of work, personal connections, or institutional credibility, with proof of work being the strongest.
- Explain context concisely by connecting it to what the other person already knows, using borrowed attention wisely.
- Make requests easy to accept by reducing costs, being specific, low-friction, and bounded in scope.
- Make it easy for the other person to say no to avoid pressured yeses and build genuine, willing help that fosters relationships.
- Never lie in requests, as dishonesty undermines credibility and any chance of a positive response.

communication

Don't be a meat proxy

Saying the quiet part out loud

Corona und dein Onkel - Bert Hubert's writings

Passive Voice Considered Harmful

Underused Techniques for Effective Emails

Talking to Technical People - Bert Hubert's writings

On Linus Torvalds, technical & corporate communications - Bert Hubert's writings

how to communicate with intent

Why Am I Doing the Thinking for You?

Preparing for a Tech Talk, Part 2: What, Why, and How — overreacted

Saying the obvious thing

The AI Boom Made Average People More Interesting

Banter

Most arguments are about ego, not ideas

How to ask for help from people who don't know you